BUTTERFLIES AS MESSENGERS FROM THE OTHER SIDE.
Did you know that butterflies are spiritual messengers? From the Other Side? One of China’s most important symbolic creatures is the butterfly. In Chinese culture the butterfly is seen as a symbol of rebirth after death and an indicator that your soulmate has arrived.
The morning after my husband died, I sat on my back deck – alone. A beautiful day had begun; the sun was up warming the soft summer air, but all I could do was cry.
Summer – my favorite season. A carefree time of long lazy days, flowers and sunshine, swimming and picnics. Shorts, T-shirts, summer dresses, toes in the grass, fingers in the earth, licking ice cream before it melts, friends popping over, outings, bicycle trips, holidays. I love it all and could not fathom, could not imagine dying in the midst of this vibrant time of year. It made no sense. But then nothing was making sense any more.
I Felt Lost
Completely. My focus, my direction, was gone. I had looked after David for so long. His needs became my needs. His care my primary concern. I cooked for him, cleaned for him, saw to all of his basic personal needs. I even learned to cut his hair! I picked up his medications, ran the household: shopping, laundry, bank, library. I was the liaison person. I took all phone calls and made all of his medical appointments.
And now there was nothing.
No loving man in the house to look after. No loving man in the hospital to visit. No worrying about his treatments, care plan, prognosis, medical condition.
I felt empty. Worse, I felt totally off balance like the carpet had been pulled out from under me. I was dizzy, aching. My head spinning. My world turned inside out. Where do I go now? What do I do?
Overwhelmed with feelings of anguish, I put my head in my hands and sobbed. Great wracking sobs. Never had I felt such grief, such excruciating suffocating pain. I was frightened, lost, completely disoriented.
My breath came in short, painful spasms. Tight bands in my chest were squeezing the air out of my lungs. What was happening to me? Blackness lapped at the edges of my vision. Dropping my head to my knees I squished myself into a little ball, hoping to make the world go away. Hoping to dispel the blackness that was threatening to pull me under.
Something whispered to my soul.
Instinctively I looked up. A butterfly was resting quietly on the back of the Other Chair.
The empty one.
The one where David would normally be sitting. It sat quite still as if waiting to be noticed. Calm. Gentle. Serene. It was her peacefulness, her simplicity, her stillness that spoke to me.
A poem sprang into my head: Do not stand at my grave and weep…
Was that David’s voice I heard in my head? I stopped crying to listen. There was nothing more. I turned my attention back to the butterfly. She was an elegant shade of orange with black markings on her wings, like eyes.
All at once I understood. I remembered the Chinese belief that whenever someone sees a butterfly, it is a soul come back from the dead to comfort those left behind. It brings a sacred message, “I am well. I am happy. Do not grieve for me.”
I sat up in the chair and rubbed my eyes.
“Did you send me this butterfly?”
I asked the air, feeling my spirits lift a bit. Somewhere from the depths of my being, I knew it had to be true. My sadness had shifted, hope was creeping in and I was beginning to feel better. Could this really be a gift or message from David? I’d never seen a butterfly with these markings before. Monarchs, yes, there were plenty of those, but this was not a monarch.
Such a powerful message in the early days following the death of my beloved husband. I was to experience many more messages from his Spirit in the days, months, and even years to come. From his spiritual Love to my earthly heart and soul, they brought me comfort and hope to continue on with my life.
Excerpt from Chapter 2, Silver Butterfly Wings,